Life with an alcoholic, addict, bi-polar / psychotic (ex) spouse. Dealing with the manic, erratic, terrifying behavior, the sadness and decisions to be made to keep sane. My decision was to leave before he completely lost his mind.
Showing posts with label abuse. Show all posts
Showing posts with label abuse. Show all posts
Saturday, March 1, 2014
157. Being Alone Does Not Mean You're Lonely
Tonight I went out to have dinner all by myself. You are probably thinking to yourself, "So what? Big deal!" It was a big deal to me. I have been 'single' for nearly a year and a half. In all of that time, and in fact for my entire life, I have never gone out to eat alone. If I didn't have someone else to go eat with me I would just get take out and eat at home. I just had the thought that if I was sitting there all alone that people would pity me. So, I just never did it to save myself from my perceived possible humiliation.
Today I ran all over the place. I got my hair done, got my car detailed and then went and had my car tuned up. By the end of the day I was starving. I grabbed my phone to order take out while waiting for my car to be finished. But, I changed my mind.
Friday, April 12, 2013
85. More Abuse - This Time By Claude
This afternoon was calm for me because I knew Mark wouldn't be getting out of jail any time soon. Chris was running out to get ice cream for everyone and asked if I wanted some. I usually say no. Today I decided to treat myself as if I had a small victory.
Chris returned with my chocolate chip scoop. Right after the second bite I knew something was wrong. One of the 'chips' wouldn't chew. It was hard - too hard. I spit it out in my mouth. Lo' and behold I was staring at part of my molar. I immediately called the dentist, but unfortunately he couldn't see me until Monday. Just my luck.
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