A few days have gone by and all has been very quiet. When that happens I worry. I know you are all shaking your head at me. But, one of the major symptoms of bipolar disorder is manic depression. That's when I start to worry. When he is quiet for days on in I start to wonder....
I also feel bad because I know he is all alone, not working and has no money, just credit cards. Sure, he has all of those coins that he has bought on Ebay. In fact, he has been paying people with them and getting ripped off. But, still he has no way to get food without a credit card. I do pay all of the bills for the house still.
I decided to send him an email to tell him to let me know when he has opened a checking account so I could start direct depositing about $200/week in there for him to get food. He responded right away and asked me if I would come out to take him grocery shopping because he still didn't have his car back or his license.
Against my better judgement I decided I would do it. I know he needs food for Jet too and I don't want the puppy to go hungry as well. I went out there on Sunday and picked him up. Remember how I told you sometimes he is Jekyll and other times he is Hyde? Well, today he was Dr. Jekyll. All day long he was very nice, very respectful and we didn't fight one time. We got him groceries and dog food. I took him to get the documents he needed to get his license. I also took him to refill his prescriptions. It was then I found out that he hasn't been taking his meds for bipolar anymore.
When we got back to the house I told him we needed to talk. He agreed. I tried to talk to him about the "agreement" I had tried to get him to consent to back in January. He didn't remember anything about it. I explained it to him again. He did tell me he now wanted to go in the hospital. Then he said, "I know you don't really want to get divorced." I told him that he was right, I hadn't wanted to. But, now after all I have been through I am not sure I could be with him again.
I also pointed out that he was in default since he never responded to my petition. He asked, "What does that mean? Am I going to go to jail?" I told him that it meant there will be a hearing. He will need to attend that. Mark started to cry again. I felt so bad. I knew all along he didn't believe any of this was happening. I even told my attorney that. I was right.
After being with him from 11 A.M. to 5 P.M. it was time for me to go home. He promised me when I left he would make an appointment for a new psychiatrist and also call St. Mary's Mental Rehabilitation Center. I left and went home (to Kristin's).
At 6 PM he called me to make sure I got home OK. Then at 10:00 PM he called and he didn't sound right (drunk). He said, "I want to be completely open and honest with you. I have had an affair. You have never done anything wrong to me and I cheated on you with Becky." I said, "You had sex with Becky? When?" He said, "No. I have been having an affair online with her for awhile now. I even contemplated how wonderful it would be to move there to Delaware with her." Then he kept on apologizing over and over. I wish I could say I was in shock, but it had been very apparent for the past year there was some sort relationship between him and her. You don't Skype with your ex-girlfriend from 30 years ago every day and chat with them and call them on the phone when you are married.
I use my phone as my alarm clock. I went to bed and he called again at midnight to say "Good Night." Then he called again at 2:15 A.M. I missed that call. But, the 4:15 call woke me up. I picked it up quick so it wouldn't wake up the family. He said he was calling because he couldn't sleep. I said, "Well, I AM asleep. Please don't call back."
I guess I set the mood for the following day. It got very nasty...
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